


Mind in the Gutter

by generally



Category: Rhett & Link
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-19
Updated: 2015-06-19
Packaged: 2018-04-05 02:27:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4162182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/generally/pseuds/generally
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An unorthodox episode of Good Mythical Morning leaves the tables turned between Rhett and Link. Rhett's not too sure if he can stay mad about it.</p><p>Based on a prompt from mamaburnie: "Link making sly, flirty comments at Rhett during GMM and GMMore, and after they're done filming Rhett is just super red and kinda flustered because normally he's the one that does shit like that"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mind in the Gutter

**Author's Note:**

> This was meant to be written in 20 minutes; it ended up taking over an hour... Hope you enjoy! :)
> 
> *Disclaimer: I don't own Good Mythical Morning. The fictitious relationship depicted below is only used for entertainment purposes.*

"Rolling in three...two...one...action."

Rhett sat up straight while Eddie did the countdown only to lean forward and perch his elbows on the table after the tape had begun. "You think sexual kinks like foot fetishes and bondage are weird? Buckle your leather belts, folks, because it's about to get a whole lot weirder. No little Mythical Beasts allowed."

From beside him, Rhett could sense his best friend Link smiling without even having to look at him. "Let's talk about that," he replied, taking a sip of coffee from one of their customized Good Mythical Morning mugs.

They held still for a few seconds, trying not to laugh while waiting for Eddie to give them the thumbs-up signal to continue.

Rhett was particularly excited for this episode, which was meant for them to discuss different sex practices from around the world, a sort of topic never explicitly covered before on Good Mythical Morning. Rhett centered part of his life's work around making inappropriate comments and promiscuous jokes during shoots to make Link uncomfortable. Not just because they were especially immature for 37-year-olds, but because Rhett loved seeing how flustered Link would get, how his neck and face would slowly turn a flushed shade of pink from the bottom up and how his worlds would trip over themselves like a drunk guy trying to walk a tightrope. It was those little moments that gave Rhett a sense of accomplishment in knowing that he had the upper hand on their friendship when it came to crude jokes.

Today's jokes were bound to write themselves given today's topic. Rhett had never been more prepared for anything in his life.

Eddie gave the thumbs-up after fiddling with the camera for a little bit, and Rhett continued. "Good Mythical Morning," he boomed, drawling out each word in the dramatic way he always expertly mustered. "Today, we'll be discussing the good, the bad, and the just plain odd of all the sex practices and rituals from around the world."

Link placed his coffee mug down on the table. "Too bad Rhett over here can't really speak for the ol' U. S. of A, so I'll be doing the talking on our behalf."

Rhett chortled a bit out of force of habit (c'mon, Link was funny as hell), but stopped. Wait, what? "Hey now, what's _that_ supposed to mean?"

Link completely ignored the question, the slightest hint of a smile on his face as he continued. "Let's dive right into it with Papua New Guinea. In the Trobriander tribe of Papa New Guinea, children start engaging in sexual activity as early as age 6."

Rhett had heard this fact before, but still did his best to act a little surprised. "Age 6?" he repeated.

Nodding, Link's smile spread just a hair. "Yessir. Fast forward to age 17 or 18, and our high school selves would be thriving pretty well on that island, huh?"

What. What the _fuck_. _Rhett_ was the one who made the scathing sex jokes, dammit! How dare Link steal this opportunity from him...while subconsciously turning him on in the process? _No,_ he though to himself. _Stop that right now, McLaughlin. Say something witty! Outsmart him!_

But nothing came out. Now it was Rhett's turn to trip over his words as he stared helplessly at Link's shit-eating smirk. How he managed to make it so sexy, Rhett may never know.

"Alright, let's move on, then," Link casually changed the subject. "Let's take a look at another group in New Guinea called the Sambian tribe."

Regaining his dignity enough to continue where Link had left off, Rhett went on. "Sambian boys are isolated from the girls at age 7 from over a decade and are subject to ritual piercings, nosebleedings, and here's the kicker: they're forced to drink the semen of their elders in order to become men."

Link snickered, throwing a sly sideways glance at Rhett. "In that case, I'm a late bloomer. I became a man at age 20. A little late, but hey, everyone's different. Right, Rhett?"

 _Oh shit_ , Rhett panicked. _He's looking at me. He's giving me that fucking LOOK. Like he wants me to fuck him senseless on this table. Shit shit shit shit._ "Alright," Rhett announced a little too loudly as his voice cracked, much to the crew's amusement, "we're done with New Guinea. Let's...uh..." He desperately scanned his cheat sheet on his laptop for the next topic. He had definitely lost his place. More like _Link_ had lost their place. He was the one skipping around their episode outline so he could make the best jokes. Fuck him. _But also, fuck him._ "...so, uh, in Ancient Greece..." He was aware of how much he was sweating now. Fuck. He was probably red as a beet. "Um...soldiers were encouraged to engage in...uh...homosexual relationships with younger boys."

"M-hm?" Link hummed, and Good God did that make Rhett want to scream.

"And wow, would you look at that! We're out of time already, folks!" Rhett plastered on a fake grin and got up fast as he could to retrieve the Wheel of Mythicality from offscreen. He prayed that his nervous sweating and blushing wasn't noticing on camera. Link just played along, knowing exactly what he was doing, and it infuriated Rhett.

They went through their standard outro, with a fairly short Good Mythical More, and Christ Alive was Rhett happy to get the hell out of the studio when they finally wrapped.

He bolted over to the coatrack to get his jacket, sans the usual conversations with the crew. He couldn't zip it up fast enough before Link strolled up to him ever so casually.

"Hey there."

"What the _hell_ was that?" Rhett hissed. He couldn't remember a time he was more irritated with his best friend.

Link cocked an eyebrow. "A taste of your own medicine." Rhett swallowed hard. "And if you want, you can come over later and I can show you what the people of Buies Creek, North Carolina like to do with their partners..."

Rhett honestly could not believe this. Since when was Link such a smooth talker? Since when was he a _better_ smooth-talker than Rhett?

"Um..." he hesitated before clearing his throat and smiling back, finally feeling like himself for the first time all day. "Good thing I'm already well-accomplished in that field of study."


End file.
